I find it funny how people think that it's okay to try and make people feel guilty for making the right decisions. Like even though it may not be the decision you wanted me to make for your benefit doesn't mean you shouldn't be happy that I stood up and said not even though it took all my might and strength. People just don't make sense to me. It's like i'm in this room with my eyes pulled open watching a tv day and night to learn about people, but no matter how much I learn I will never understand them! PEOPLE ARE CRAZY!!!! They will never make sense. They are all selfish and will do anything they can to make their lives better and easier. It's natural human nature to be self absorbed. It's something that not everybody can fight or cares to fight off, some people are just okay with living to please themselves. I know it must be so much easier to not care about hurting people. But some people actually have a heart! i know it's crazy! But they do! And the ones that do will be there for people even if it means they end up hurt in the end because they don't care what happens to them as long as they helped somebody else. Okay that was really choppy but my mind is seriously blank right now.
I can't believe I graduate this year!!!! It's so crazy! I'm so ready to walk across that stage and get that stupid piece of paper that i've worked so hard for! I'm ready for life to start, to be able to provide for myself completely and not have to worry about answering to a teacher. I'm ready to stop being told who I can and can't hang out with, i'm just sick of being told how to live my life. Then being told to be my own person and when I try to be I get told that i'm doing it wrong and that isn't who I should be. I want to be done with living life that way. I don't want people to make me feel guilty when I screw up but instead kick me in the a** and tell me to get my act together. That's all I need! I don't need someone to sit down with me and tell me why I should feel bad because I guarantee you I already feel that way and have already thought about it so please don't make it worse! I just need a smack in the face sometimes! I can't wait to live life for me. To be free. To expand my way of life and experience new things and new places. I won't be that girl that after high school works at a fast food restaurant and comes home to her crumby boyfriend that she only stays with because she needs a place to live! I will be the girl that travels the world and lives life the best she possibly can and finds a man that she loves more than she loves herself! That is the girl I will be! I will be successful but still have time to have fun! I won't waste my time on stupid dramatic stuff. I will be the girl that people will look at and want to live life like me!
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